Letter to my Heroine

January 6, 2013

One of my heros has always been, and will always be, my sister--Bobbie Jeanne Byars. 

From always having the guts to ask dad if we could do something when I was too chicken to; to fighting with each other when we had friends over because I was jealous of her attention towards them; from "sleeping" on the roof on summer nights and looking at the stars and talking about anything and everything; to moving 12 times before we were done with highschool.  Through various relationships, random fashion disasters, crazy friends, even crazier family, and through this latest grieving, she has been my touchstone, my compass, my check-in to make sure I'm making the least crazy of all the crazy decisions (or at least knowing why I'm not).

Bobbie, if I could, I would carry all of your pain, your doubts, your regrets, your dilemmas. I would take them and throw them as far as the end of the universe and place happiness, lightness and joy in their place.  

But, I cannot.  

What I can do is let you know that I am willing, and able, to shoulder the burden with you.  You're not alone.  I know we all have to travel our own paths, but I'm in this with you.  You have always been my strength.  You may not have known that, but you are.  And I want to be that for you.

I am fiercely proud of you. I will fight for you.  I will fight by your side.  I will defend you and do my damnedest to protect you.  I will constantly hope for your happiness and fulfillment.  I will be your biggest fan and most loyal follower.  I will fight to keep you in my life and to stay connected with you wherever our separate paths lead.

I may not always understand where you are or where you are going, but I will always support you in your pursuit of happiness.

I declare my undying love, my devotion and my fierce pride for you.  

You are my ability to stand strong in the face of adversity.  You are my ability to laugh at fate.  You are my guiding light that I double check my decisions with.

I love you, Bobbie.  

I love you, dear sister.  

I love you, strong, fiercely independent friend.

Your devoted soul-mate,

GinaMarie